Woodgate? Is he having a laff?

With his well worn bar stool, laptop and wireless broadband dongle, the Blackie Boy`s finest patron, Sir Alan of Oliver is well and truly washed up off the Newcastle radar. Struggling to find anything to say since losing the lofty position he held within the inner sanctum in the Shepherd era, he`s turned to a muddle of half baked half truths and speculation.

I`ll hold my hand up and say that back in 2002 I think, prior to Christmas and at Southampton away on the train down to St Mary`s, he told us that Woodgate was signing first time round, a good three weeks before he eventually inked the deal, saying Shepherd had agreed the deal with Leeds but to avoid any chew with their fans it would be a bit until it was announced. Sure enough he signed and I gave Oliver some kudos for genuinely being 'In the Know`.

Fast forward five years and he`s been tucked up more times than Little Lord Fauntleroy. His latest efforts come with no quotes, fees or any idea of a deal, merely speculating Keegan has him on a list of targets.

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