Writer: Ross Molyneux 
Date:Tuesday July 29 2008
Time: 6:50PM
Having seen the matter of all speculation focused on the club since Barton`s release yesterday, generally featuring lesser terms of endearment such as 'gutter`, 'sewer`, 'monster` and 'cigar stubbed out in face`, the club moved to close off any further chatter on the subject with an abrupt statement this afternoon:
'Newcastle United officials can confirm they have met with Joey Barton, following which it has been agreed by everyone involved that Joey will remain with the club. The club will not be making any further comment at this time.'
Moralists will shout from the rooftops but realists will be glad the club saw sense. Rehabilitation is the only way we`ll get any money or return back from the expensive Scouse Hannibal Lector and, with the club looking as attractive to new players as Vanessa Feltz spread-eagled this summer, we just need people who are capable of pulling on the shirt.
Loathe or loathe Barton at least he might keep his head down and do a job for us. Hopefully. Kev deserves some payback for his sheer persistence in sticking out this bugger of a summer.
Things are looking good after all! (Saturday May 25 2013)
More NUFC Spin (Friday May 24 2013)
Lack of ambition confirmed! (Friday May 24 2013)
10th or Else (Thursday May 23 2013)
Decision time? (Thursday May 23 2013)
Carroll Linked With NUFC (Again) (Tuesday May 21 2013)
The Abuse Of NUFC Has To End. Now!! (Tuesday May 21 2013)
The Reality Of Newcastle United (Monday May 20 2013)
Stats: Newcastle United v Arsenal (Sunday May 19 2013)
The Weight Of The Shirt (Friday May 17 2013)
| 1. | Toon_NoMatterWot | 464 |
| 2. | Toon_Demon | 319 |
| 3. | Rza | 288 |
| 4. | BLACKBOB | 268 |
| 5. | Rexn | 267 |
| 6. | Boomboomcheiktheroom | 262 |
| 7. | officemonkey | 255 |
| 8. | taffontyne | 246 |
| 9. | steekiebrown | 245 |
| 10. | Platinii | 222 |
| Latest Results | ||||
| Newcastle | 0 | - | 1 | Arsenal |
| Q.P.R. | 1 | - | 2 | Newcastle |
| West Ham | 0 | - | 0 | Newcastle |
| Newcastle | 0 | - | 6 | Liverpool |
| WBA | 1 | - | 1 | Newcastle |
| Newcastle | 0 | - | 3 | Sunderland |
| Team | P | W | D | L | GD | Pts |
| 13. Stoke | 38 | 9 | 15 | 14 | -11 | 42 |
| 14. Southampton | 38 | 9 | 14 | 15 | -11 | 41 |
| 15. Aston Villa | 38 | 10 | 11 | 17 | -22 | 41 |
| 16. Newcastle | 38 | 11 | 8 | 19 | -23 | 41 |
| 17. Sunderland | 38 | 9 | 12 | 17 | -13 | 39 |
| 18. Wigan | 38 | 9 | 9 | 20 | -26 | 36 |
| 19. Reading | 38 | 6 | 10 | 22 | -30 | 28 |
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